Died and Reborn

I will be relocating back to where I grew up after 14 years.

During the relocation my ascendant moves from 14 degrees Aries to 18 degrees Pisces.

It goes through the Spring Zero point, the point that represents endings and beginnings. I hope, it doesn't represent actual death.

But well, that has been my experience when I moved here 15 years ago. I was forced to become somebody else. I resisted with all my might, with everything I got. But ultimately gave in, I think.

Basically, I was extremely naive about my own country, India. Till I came here and found myself facing, quite literally, death itself.

I was being destroyed physically, nothing agreed with me. Found out how superficial everyone really is. Had to give up all my previous hopes and dreams and start anew.

But now, an opportunity to go back. I would love to go back. The resulting ascendant would be sextiling my sun and moon, by being at their midpoint.

But my ascendant will have to pass through zero degrees Aries, which I fear, is the point of death.

Let's wait and see how literal all this is. And besides, I can't say if I have changed, died and reborn, for sure. Only an outsider can. Or maybe I can when I go back and see if I feel the same things I used to, or if that part of me has been completely destroyed. Or will I have to go through another process of death?

Or would it be like coming back from the dead?

It has been difficult, I can say that.

Also, the journey date seems to be coinciding with my first Saturn return.